A goat approaches
“We are a people who honour democracy,” said the dog, scratching himself.
“Per our custom, you may drink of our fresh water.”
We spoke in his home village at dawn.
I suppose every politician has their enemies.
ThatCaves Of Qudcreates fun anecdotes out of simple encounters shouldn’t be a surprise.
It is a machine of grand imagination and adventuresome comedy.
A deceptively powerfulRPGthat isn’t half as obtuse to newcomers as the screenshots make it out to be.
Qud’s low-res bark is just a complement to its bite.
That said, if you’ve not played many classicalroguelikesbefore, it may still appear intimidating.
For me, that’s easy to get used to.
Approach it both as a grand sci-fantasy epic and as a dry, knowing comedy.
“Everything you learned in the cave applies here too,” it says reassuringly.
“Villages are like caves with very high roofs.”
It’s got a lot going on, yes.
But nothing moves unless you do.
Nothing will hit you until you take a step yourself.
In its pause-by-pause way, the traditional roguelike is a hugely forgiving thing.
Until, of course, it is not.
A sign of quality in games can sometimes be divined in the variety of its deaths.
“You were killed by a chaingun turret.”
Sure, try it.
But also: fire muskets, throw grenades, rend minds with a mental attack.
It will often go badly.
There is no end to the perishing, with demises ranging from the mundane to the extraordinary.
Later, I was gas-bombed by my parallel universe twin, aka “salty bloody evil Borkubine”.
He’s “evil” because he is not me.
In that life, I was playing as a quill-covered, multi-limbed spiderfreak I named “Borkubine”.
True to roguelike form, you perish and that is that.
Then, in a single lapse of attention, all those shiny upgrades and special weapons are gone.
It elicits a state of tense freedom.
Let’s see, what do we have this time?
Slime glands that’ll spit toxins?
As lucky dips go, it is a violently exciting assortment of treats.
Mutations are not all combat-focused.
Handy, but then eating food is not in itself a chore.
Basic meals are randomly generated at any campfire.
The game simply “whips up” something.
But it’s also a list of all the simple matters of the day.
And anyway the actual text is a great example of otherworldly video game language.
The kind that has evolved separately to mainstream action adventures with all their cinematic dialogue.
“Crabs dislike you… You aren’t welcome in their holy places.”
One of the more confusing selling points of Qud is its procedural generation.
Or to be more accurate, itspartialprocedural generation.
The game is not 100% random every run.
Villages and other important locations remain the same, but the “history” of the world is random.
you’re free to see why things might get confusing.
This combo of random and unchanged elements can feel inscrutable, even as it adds mystery and variety.
There is a depth and colour I won’t be able to communicate in a single review.
There is a peculiar joy to working out the rules of this world.
The game is a mechanism in and of itself.
And you will go there in search of answers, without a doubt.
But my favourite Qud-tale is about a goatman called Indix.
I find myself in a mushroom village, where a stocky goatman is standing watch.
I approach him and say hello.
He is known as Indix, the “pariah”.
I ask why he’s called that - “pariah”.
But he warns me not to ask again.
I take the hint and change the subject.
I want to be on good terms with these villagers.
I am a musketeer.
I need any bullets they have to sell.
So I turn to the water ritual - the universal ritual for boosting relationships.
Unfortunately, all other goatfolk now absolutely hate my guts, just for fraternising with this one excommunicated goatlad.
My curiosity is too much.
No, really, I say, I gotta know.
He reacts to my prying questions, let us say, passionately.
I immediately begin sprinting away.
It is a wise decision.
Hostile enemies are given rankings of difficulty.
A dog-like snapjaw might be “easy”, a centipede could be “average”.
The goatman is described as “impossible”.
I am not doing this today.
I will get my musket balls elsewhere, thanks.
It misses, and I hightail it out of there.
This was one funny disaster from one of dozens of lives.
By contrast, I have barely made a dent.
Yes, you will have to embrace and decipher the lore-riddled lingo.
And you will have to stoically acknowledge infinite death as a means of learning the arcane rules of survival.
