This feels like that.

It’s like a fake game made up by a Hollywood television producer."

Oh no, the cops!

Travis Barker, played by Michael Madsen, the main character of Crime Boss: Rockay City

in a compact map.

It makes for a good time!

And this would theoretically be the case with Crime Boss too.

Cover image for YouTube video

What you mostly do in the game is crime, delivered in standalone, instanced nuggets.

These crimes are delivered in three different contexts.

If you fail a level in Urban Legends you have to start at the beginning.

A heap of dead police officers in the hallway of a bank, under the pop up alert telling you the police are retreating

There are seeds of good ideas here.

This’d be a neat take on the single player for a primarily co-op-friendly game.

Unfortunately, Crime Boss has done whatever the opposite of nailing the fundamentals is.

Breaking open a bank vault with a drill in Crime Boss: Rockay City

It has pulled all the nails out of the fundamentals.

The prospect of dying and doing loads of the game again is, therefore, depressing.

That’s not an AI thing, but it is pretty funny.

The team selection screen in Crime Boss: Rockay City

They are, by a generous margin, the worst thing about Crime Boss!

as if he’s browsing at a local WI fete.

Kim Basinger mostly just kind of stands there.

The main map screen of the single-player for Crime Boss: Rockay City

And of course they are!

This isn’t their wheelhouse!

It’s a no brainer, surely?

I’m not going to begrudge the Dannys, bothGloverand Trejo, a pension.